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(The camera cuts from a black screen to the Skullship)

Hater: AAAGH!

(The camera zooms in on the Skullship's right eye and Lord Hater's room is shown from the inside. The door opens, and Lord Hater enters it)

Hater: Stupid Wander! (He kicks an American football) Blew up my top secret storage facility and stole back all the stuff I rightfully stole first! (screams angrily) (woefully) How could this day get any worse? (Captain Tim pins Hater to the floor, causing him to roll and laugh) Captain Tim! Okay! Okay! I give! You win! Who's a good boy? You's a good boy! Ha ha ha!

Hater: Stupid Dominator! (He kicks a milkshake) Stealing my planet! I HATE HIM SO MUCH! (Captain Tim pins Hater to the floor, causing him to roll and laugh) Heel, Tim. Heel.

Hater: Stupid Dominator! (He kicks a hamburger) Blowing up my concert to impress her! I LIKE HER SO MUCH! (Captain Tim pins Hater to the floor, causing him to roll and laugh) Ha ha ha!

Hater: Stupid! Dumb! Terrible! Worst! Day! Ever! (Captain Tim shows up after each word, making Lord Hater feel better) (Hater laughs and pets Captain Tim) Oh, Tim, you always brighten up a bad day! Hahaha! (Captain Tim bites his head, causing it to fall off) Hahaha!

Hater: Stupid cafeteria! (He kicks a purple teddy bear plushie) Serving tacos when I specifically asked for taquitos! Captain Tim, this is the worst thing that's ever happened! (silence) The worst thing that has ever happened! (silence) Tim? (looks under his bed) Tim? (pulls over his bed sheet and picks up the football) Tim? (looks inside Thunder Blazz bottle) Tim? (standing on his bed) Tim? (behind directory) Tim? (in button room, up close) Tim? (peeking into examination room) Tim? (in the room that leads to the Pit of Perpetual Pain) Tim? (in the prison hall) Tim? (in the torture room) Tim? (in the screening room) Tim? (in the room with the caged creatures) Tim? (in the food court) Tim?! (to Watchdog servant) TAQUITOS! (checks the locker room) Tim?!

(A Watchdog named Tim comes out of one of the lockers.)

Tim: You rang?

Hater: Who are you?

Tim: I'm Tim, the lovable Watchdog!

Hater: No, I'm looking for Captain Tim!

Tim: Ooh, I'm a captain now?

Hater: What? Ew, no! You're the wrong Tim and always will be!

Tim: My mistake! (He salutes and goes back to the locker)

Hater: TIIIIIIIII-- (freeze frame, title card appears) --IIIIIIM!!

Tim: (Comes out of the locker again) Yeah? Oops, sorry. Not me. (Goes back)

(Cut to Lord Hater standing on a stage in front of many watchdogs)

Hater: Watchdogs! We have toppled mighty empires, laid waste to fearsome enemies. But today we face a mission more important than any we've ever encountered. (He starts crying) My Tim-Tim went bye-bye and I don't know where he is and I miss my Tim-Tim!

Various Watchdogs: (Begin cheering and hugging each other) He's gone! We survived! The nightmare is over!

(The screen behind Lord Hater changes to show a crossed out Captain Tim. Peepers runs on the stage, climbs on top of Lord Hater and opens a bottle)

Hater: (Shocked) You're... happy Tim-Tim is gone?

Peepers: Overjoyed! (He beams) Ha-ha-ha! Whoo! (Stops) Oh, uh, sorry, sir. I know you cared for that... thing, but Captain Tim wasn't really a pet, so much as a... um, hideous monster trying to maul everybody on the ship!

Hater: But he was my hideous monster trying to maul everybody on the ship! (He runs off crying, causing Peepers to fall off the stage. The other Watchdogs catch him as balloons and confetti start flying everywhere)

Watchdogs: Whoo-hoo! Yeah!

(Cut to Lord Hater laying on the floor in his room, crying)

Hater: Well, forget them! I am the great and terrible Lord Hater! I get what I want, when I want, and right now I want my buddy back! I shall unleash all of my power to find him!!! (Cut to him trying to give out "Missing" posters)

Hater: Excuse me, have you seen this Tim? Hey, has anyone tried to eat your face off recently? Do you have a tummy ache? 'Cause sometimes he spits acid in your tummy while you're sleeping. HAS ANYONE SEEN CAPTAIN TIM?!

(Cut to an alien ripping one of the "Missing" posters in half with an arachnomorph leg)

Alien: Yeah. I've seen that... thing. Every night in my dreams before I wake up SCREAMING, drenched in sweat and regret.

Hater: So you have seen him then, or--?

Alien: I know his kind! Arachnomorphs. Blood-sucking, acid-spitting beasts that can tear through the hull of your ship like tissue paper... or your entire crew...

Hater: That's my Tim-Tim!

Ripov: Name's Ripov. I've been trackin' the trail of mayhem and tears his species has spread across the galaxy.

Hater: Kinda like a dogcatcher?

Ripov: Yeah. Kinda. But I'm always one step behind them. Never met anyone 'sides me who came up against one and survived. With your help, I can finally hunt down this monstrosity and every one of his kind! (She throws nine daggers into another "Missing" poster)

Hater: I'm really just looking for the one, but great! Let's move! (He beams)

(Cut to Ripov's ship, zoom in on Hater looking out the window with tears in his eyes)

Hater: (Sings sadly)

My best buddy's name is Captain Tim

There's no one in the universe quite like him

Quick and snappy happy little guy

I love him just so much I think I might... just... die...

(He falls over again, deflated. Ripov walks up to him and takes his arm)

Hater: Hey! I'm having, like, a moment here?!

Ripov: QUIET! (She takes a device that resembles a flashlight and turns it on, pointing it at Lord Hater's arm) I'm scanning for traces of the 'Morph's DNA. Then I'll be able to track him. (The device shows gears in Lord Hater's arm, Ripov scoffs) Nothing. Wait, is this a robot arm?

Hater: Oh, sorry, that was a whole thing. Here, try this. (He hands her a Wander squeaky toy covered in acid, she takes it, looking angry) Hey! Careful, that's his favorite Squeepy-Beepy!

Ripov: 'Morphs don't have a favorite anything! (She throws the toy on a bigger device and scans it) They're instinct-driven killing machines. If you wanna survive, remember, they don't care about Squeepy-Beepies and they definitely don't care about you. (She points a finger at Hater, then moves away without changing her posture as a stone grinding sound plays)

Hater: That's not true. (cries) Captain Tim's a good boy.

Ripov: Quinton VI. 'Morphs wiped out a colonial mining operation. Tried to take my arm with it. (She takes off the bandage on her left arm, showing that less of a half of it is left)

Hater: Oh, yeah? Wander ruined my invasion of Kameron, so Tim cheered me up with some love bites! (He shows his head with chunks of the back of his head and chin missing)

Ripov: (Moves the collar on her neck, revealing a prosthetic) 'Morph tried to eat me alive on Wutani.

Hater: (Shows what little is left of his acid-covered ribcage) Drooly acid kisses on Cluckon.

Ripov: (Takes off her left shoe, revealing a hook for a leg) Ambush at the Farbrix Lavadrome!

Hater: (Throws the lower half of his right leg) Game of fetch on Seacironicus V! (He falls over)

(Lord Hater and Ripov stare each other down. Suddenly an alarm is heard. Ripov runs up to the computer)

Ripov: My grop. So that's where they are.

Hater: (Pops up behind her) What? What is it?

Ripov: It's Arachnomorph mating season.

Hater: (Peeks behind her from from the other side) Arachno-what's-this-now?

Ripov: (Speaks as the camera zooms in on her face) Every mating season, the Arachno-Queen summons all eligible males to their home world. (Cut to said half-eaten homeworld with a smaller planet connected to it. Both planets are covered in acid. Audio waves come from a cave on the bigger planet, reaching Captain Tim as he holds the Wander squeaky toy and sleeps next to Lord Hater. When the audio wave reaches him, he wakes up, growls and follows it, leaving Lord Hater's room and then the Skullship. He makes an acidic web and uses it as a parachute) They travel on solar winds across the galaxy to fight for the Queen's honor and amusement.

Hater: (Speaks as Captain Tim is shown approaching the planet alongside dozens of other arachnomorphs) Um, bros before Arachnos. Tim would never leave me for some monster lady.

Ripov: No emotion! Instinct! They fight to the death! (Captain Tim lands) And the lone survivor will emerge as the new Arachno-King! (He is surrounded by other arachnomorphs, who are bigger than him)

Hater: Aw, Tim's a scrappy little guy! He can take care of himself! (Captain Tim growls and a fight between him and the other arachnomorphs ensues. Cut to Ripov's ship flying above the planet. The arachnomorphs beat Captain Tim and stop to look at the ship. Lord Hater looks out the window and spots his pet)

Hater: It's Captain Tim! Pull over! Pull over! (All the arachnomorphs leave Captain Tim to approach Ripov's ship. He looks dizzy and falls to the ground. Ripov pushes Hater away from the window and looks outside herself)

Ripov: The 'Morph home world. (Cut to dozens of arachnomorphs approaching her ship as the camera zooms out to show the reflection of Ripov's face on the window) After years of searching, the war is almost over, and nothing will keep the weary warrior from earning her rest on the fiery field of-- (She charges a gun as Lord Hater runs to the door happily)

Hater: I'm coming, Tim-Tim!

Ripov: Don't open that... (Lord Hater opens the door and sees dozens of arachnomorphs trying to squeeze into the room) ...door.

Hater: Umm... (he points to the floor) sit. (The arachnomorphs pour into the room, attacking Lord Hater. Ripov blasts them, fending them off and eventually setting foot outside)

Ripov: You bugs messed with the wrong grizzled loner! I'm not gonna stop until I put down every last one of ya! (She continues to blast the arachnomorphs)

Hater: (Peeks out of the ship as the camera zooms on his surprised face) You're gonna WHAT?!

Ripov: (Points her weapon at Captain Tim, who stands idly by) Bye-bye, Tim-Tim! (Her weapon is thrown out of her hands as Lord Hater blasts it with his lightning. He steps between her and Captain Tim, hovering above the ground)

Hater: Get away from my special little guy.

(Lord Hater and Ripov stare each other down again. Ripov grabs a gun and jumps at Lord Hater while firing shots.)

Ripov: Rawr!

(Lord Hater blasts her with lightning, causing her to bump into her ship and land in a pile of weapons)

Hater: (Turns around) Tim-Tim! Come to da-da! (They run towards each other. Happy music plays when Lord Hater is show, scary music when Captain Tim is. The latter jumps into the air, but Ripov pushes Lord Hater out of the way, making Captain Tim miss them)

Ripov: (Holding Lord Hater's hands behind his back) Are you nuts? (She grunts) They're mindless killing machines! (Captain Tim calls out and is surrounded by other arachnomorphs again; he resumes fighting them)

Hater: (Tries to break free) Look who's... talking! (He rolls over, causing him and Ripov to fall into a ravine. They land on an acidic web and get stuck)

Hater: (Tries to break free) Ewww, gross! (music stops) You got a moist towelette in one of those pouches?

Ripov: Quiet, you idiot! You don't want to alert... (loud screeching is heard) the Queen.

(The Arachnomorph Queen shows up, looking much bigger than any of the male arachnomorphs. She approaches Lord Hater and Ripov, invoking fear in them, and screeches)

Hater: It's okay. Captain Tim will rescue me any second now.

Ripov: For the last time, no, he's--

(An explosion is heard and seen. Lord Hater looks in its direction happily)

Hater: Captain Tim!

(Camera cuts to Peepers standing next to a huge drill)

Peepers: Sir! I'm sorry I let you go alone, but I'm here to rescue you! (The Arachnomorph Queen shoots out a web, getting him stuck next to Lord Hater and Ripov) No!

(Another explosion is heard and seen. Lord Hater looks in its direction happily)

Hater: Captain Tim!

(Camera cuts to Wander waving his hand. He pulls out a "Missing" poster of Captain Tim out of his hat)

Wander: Hater! I saw this missing Tim sign and rushed to-- (The Arachnomorph Queen shoots out a web, getting him stuck next to Lord Hater, Ripov and Peepers)

(Another explosion is heard and seen. Lord Hater looks in its direction happily)

Hater: Captain Tim!

(Camera cuts to Sylvia looking worried. She holds up a "Missing" poster)

Sylvia: Wander! I saw this missing Tim sign and assumed you would-- (The Arachnomorph Queen shoots out a web, getting her stuck next to Lord Hater, Ripov, Peepers and Wander) What!

(Another explosion is heard and seen. Lord Hater looks in its direction happily)

Hater: Captain Tim!

(Camera cuts to Tim the Watchdog as he climbs out of a crater)

Tim: Nope. Watchdog Tim again. Hey, what's goin' on in here? (The Arachnomorph Queen shoots out a web, getting him stuck next to Lord Hater, Ripov, Peepers, Wander and Sylvia)

(The Arachnomorph Queen approaches, growling. She walks up to Lord Hater's face and screeches, when suddenly, an arachnomorph falls on Hater's head. The two look up and see Captain Tim, who emerged victorious in the fight and stands on a pile of arachnomorphs. He jumps on the web and stands in front of The Arachnomorph Queen. The two growl and screech at each other. Cut to Hater)

Hater: Captain Tim! In your face, Ripov! He beat up all those other jerks and now he's--

Ripov: Doing exactly what I said he was doing. (Cut to Captain Tim rubbing against the Queen.) He doesn't care. He can't change. They're just gonna make more little monsters and we're gonna be baby food! Happy?!

(Lord Hater looks deflated. The camera zooms out to show Captain Tim and the Queen going for a kiss. Suddenly, Tim shoots acid in the Queen's face, causing her to fall over. He ties her up in her own web and spits acid, freeing everyone from the web)

Hater: Tim! (Captain Tim jumps on him) Mmmm! I missed you so much! (Cut to Ripov looking displeased) Ha! Double fake-out! Captain Tim burned you good! (Zoom out to show Watchdog Tim as his chest is covered in acid)

Tim: AAAH!!! Captain Tim burned me good! AAAH!!! (He runs off)

Hater: Never leave me again. Never ever ever. (Ripov turns Lord Hater around and looks like she's about to punch him. She points at Captain Tim)

Ripov: YOU!!! (Cut to her petting Tim) Pretty impressive. Even I couldn't take out a 'Morph Queen like that. I guess bad things can change.

(Cut to Wander jumping up to poke Lord Hater. The latter pushes him away)

Wander: Ehhhhhhhhhh?

(Suddenly Captain Tim jumps on Ripov's shoulder and rubs against her. Lord Hater lookes distressed for a second, then calms down. Ripov, looking surprised at first, smiles and pets Tim. The latter lets out a content growl)

Hater/Peepers/Wander/Sylvia: Aww!

(Captain Tim licks Ripov)

Hater/Peepers/Wander/Sylvia: Aww!

(Captain Tim attempts to maul Ripov)

Hater/Peepers/Wander/Sylvia: AHHH!!!

(Lord Hater takes Captain Tim, preventing him from literally stealing Ripov's heart)

Hater: (Laughs nervously as everyone else looks at him and Tim, terrified) Baby steps. (Captain Tim starts biting Lord Hater as Ripov, Peepers, Wander and Sylvia back away slowly) Oh. Quit it! Okay! Oh, Tim you always brighten up a bad day!

(Captain Tim jumps at the camera.)

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